I was told this today by a 96 year 'young' lady !! It's also not the first time in the last year or so she's said this !! This pearl of a lady is my Nan. The eldest and one of 2 remaining of 6. She has always been an inspiration to not only me, but a rather large family and countless others she's touched over the years.
Born 96 years ago in dying weeks of the year that marked Australia's birth on the International stage, 1915. The year of the ANZAC's. They bred them tough back then, those children of the First World War, and later young adults of the Depression, and Second World War. On her Mother's side, convicts, amongst them first and second fleeters', on her Father's Scottish publicans and further back a poet for a great, great, great Uncle.
In those 96 years of living, what a life ! Sitting and chatting with her over years she recounted visiting her Granny at the farm. Granny, to me until recently, was a lovely memory of Nan's. A memory laden with rose scents, pink soap, laying on the grass watching clouds drift by, and the person she went to when life was hard. The person for whom she was named (mind you until 2 years ago I didn't know that - not sure why that was, more likely I never asked !). 2 years ago all because of a question asked by my daughter, I started to research my family tree - it's certainly been an interesting journey, but more on that in a later post. This journey took me in part to Granny. I've been able to get pictures and stories about Granny, now when Nan talks about her she's a living breathing person in my mind, not a long distant relation.
From Granny to chasing the family's cow back into the yard to milk it for her Mum. I love the chortles that this story evokes in her each time, as though she has been transported back to chasing Daisy back into the yard. Though the frustration is also palatable !!
From chasing Daisy to the early years of her marriage to Pop. The interesting tales of no electricity, running water and Pop bringing home a dog that wasn't theirs, but certainly looked like it. Hard years, and yet Nan prefers to remember the happy times. These years include the war years. Pop was away in New Guinea.
The move from a small northern NSW town to the 'big smoke'. Nan and Pop had 4 children, who between them have had 14 children. Please don't ask me to count the great grandkids .... I lost count after 25 !! and there's a couple on the way ! yeap we know how to breed !!
The passing of her husband in 1978, saw a whole new chapter. In the ensuing years we all needed a calendar to keep up with her latest travels, spent mainly with her youngest sister. It became the standing joke that you had to check the calendar to check if Nan were home before you called !! Trips overseas to Scotland to follow their father's roots, trips to Canada, New Zealand and more. Coupled with travelling to all corners of this great nation, many times over !
In between her travels she looked after the grandkids and taught us all to enjoy and embrace our surroundings. Having never attained a drivers licence, Nan walked everywhere and I mean everywhere !! If a bus were late, no matter she'd walk from Maroubra to Randwick, or Maroubra to Little Bay. Or often from her flat to Maroubra Junction. When she still had Sam ('the dog') it was nothing to be walking from her place in Maroubra to the beach or down Beauchamp Pde for hours (or at least at 6 - 10 it felt like hours !!). Holidays with Nan often meant exploring the local environment, be it beach, bush, mangrove or a combination of all three. Even in the city walks with Nan took on an exploratory feel !! It's amazing what you see when you're not driving or being driven !!
As her travels slowed down, Nan volunteered at a local school helping those with English as a Second Language to read. This brought a new family into her life, a Bosnian family who today some 25 plus years later still ring, write and visit her when they are in the country. They call her their 'Australian Nan'. Such has been the impact of Nan's very special qualities.
Another group further touched by Nan, is a very special group. For almost 10 years, Nan visited Prince of Wales Children's ward. She sat with the most vulnerable of children daily. Terminally ill infants, allowing their parents a much needed breather, either for a simple shower; or to catch up with their spouses or other children. Many times over those 10 years Nan would be called by the family to sit with them as they said their final farewells to their own special angels, to say her own farewell to those special angels. There have been many times over the years that Nan and I would talk about her very special charges, and they and their families impact on her. One in particular I've never forgotten. He wasn't an infant but a boy who had battled a brain tumor for many many years. His story was a very special one to her. His passing particularly hard for her. She was 91 when she had to stop going to sit with her special kids.
91 was the year of change .... Her Macular Degeneration finally started to impact her ability to see, this was coupled with the need for a pacemaker. These started to slow her down. It was also the year she left the independence of her own home and entered a Nursing Home.
Slowly over the last 5 years her health has declined. Gone are the days of walking miles and miles, gone are the days of choosing how to spend her day, gone are the days of reading, crosswords, watching her favourite shows, or even crocheting.
September of last year saw the greatest change. This once mentally and physically strong woman is sadly but a shell of herself, and sadly she's very aware of it.... hence "growing old sucks, Leah". Nan falls regularly, suffers tremors constantly, and worst of all, for Nan, needs help with the most basic of hygiene needs. In October not long after she began to recover, her youngest sister, the one she was closest to passed away. This hit her particularly hard. Nan has only 1 sister remaining, sadly Meg lives in far North Qld.
She's now as good as she can be, but for those of us watching her, her children most especially, it's bloody hard. Everyday she gets more and more tired. Our reality is that as the veil between this life and the next becomes thinner and thinner for her, the day drawers nearer that we must say goodbye.
It makes each visit more and more precious. What she has given us all though is beyond words. Memories to last a lifetime, memories to share with our own grandchildren of a very cherished grandmother who has left an indelible mark on all our lives. Hopefully (if I should last another 56 years) I can sit and smile with my granddaughter and great-granddaughter as she has, and remember Nan with fondness. I can never smell gardenia's, jonquils, or freesia's without thinking of Nan. As I think back over our many talks, walks and countless other memories, I have a slideshow of memories flowing by.
She's a wonderful woman, role model and hero. It's why the kids and I are going to see her again tomorrow, because one day they'll have the chance to tell their kids and grandkids about the extra special lady that was their great Nan.
As that veil thins, I say goodbye each time with more and more emotion. But I'm thankful for the time I've been blessed with.
